Suka is a poor little begger. Emphasis on "Poor." She can't beg to save her life. That doesn't stop her from trying, though. A 'good' beg involves a touch of subtlty, a bit of acting, and a complete lack of shame. The "Oh, poor me, I'm sooooo hungry, but I would NEVER dream of taking food from you while you're at the table" act, combined with the ever-so-brief but artfully longing glances at your plate, and maybe a heavy sigh or two... THAT is the stuff of a good beg.
Suka, on the other hand, spoils it. She can't get past the "Hey, you've got food! Gonna give me some, huh? Are ya? ARE YA..?! No..?! Rats. Huf. I guess I'll go hide in a corner where you can't see me." No follow through. No pathos. No subtlty. No art. However... She does have me, and my own stupidity, on her side. See, when I cook (and I cook a lot), I tend to camp right by the stove. And Suka will come in, look hopefully about for spills, and then set up camp nearby. Not begging, just hanging out - I don't have a plate yet, so am a poor target for a well-executed beg, much less her version of same. So there I am, killing time, with a dog nearby... Ah-ha! Training opportunity! I'm sure most of y'all know where this is going, already...
So, I'm there, the food is on the stove, and the reefer is right by my side... And that's where I keep the spare StinkyKibble(tm). So, thoughtlessly, I once snagged a bag of the odiferous treat, and proceed to work on Suka's sits, downs, stays, "gimme paws," and the like. Anyone care to guess what lesson the dog was really learning..? Yeah. So now, I've got a salivating dog at my side whenever I cook... And she's not even begging.
Oops!
It's not all going her way, though! Tonight, I was nibbling whilst cooking - Much of the family is sick, and that means I'm catering to three different requests for comfort food. Well, they all have the same base, but it takes a while to cook, and then turn out the variations-on-a-theme my basket cases all desperately want. So I'm snacking a little, as I cook - A few home-made taquitos I whipped up on the side. Just exactly the kind of thing a dog-on-the-make might try to wheedle out of me - If she knew how to wheedle. But I've also got a little bowl of home-made hotsauce with me, into which I'm dipping the taquitos... It's nothing fancy, just an experiment in flavors (not quite right yet. Still missing some of the "low" notes...), but it's pretty sharp - It makes me break out in a nice sweat. I dip a taquito in the bowl, and look over at Suka, sooo blatantly begging. "Heh" thinks I, and I hold it down where she can get a good sniff... Now, Suka isn't a little puppy, and she's no oldster - She's right smack in the middle of 'prime time,' and she's fast! Out snake the jaws of doom, preparing to neatly sever half my rolled tortilla treat when suddenly she freezes. I can almost hear the screeching halt she's just slammed on her jaws, and the deeply wounded look on her face is priceless. "What the hell is THAT crap..?" I can almost hear her thinking.
Suka looks at me... Looks at the offending snack, and then back at me again. And she sits back down again. The fun just went out of drooling near the stove for tonight! I didn't compound my crime by offering her a non-spicy treat to sniff, next. Once was enough... I'm not going to mess with her head by mixing things up. Though she did come close enough to sniff the bowl I was holding, and give me an incredibly non-plussed look. "You EAT that stuff..?! Dude, that is wrong." Of course, considering that she likes StinkyKibble(tm), I can't say as I have much respect for her culinary palatte.
:-p
2 comments:
Love this post! I got a new dog a week ago, and she is clearly accustomed to being given food from the table and kitchen counter. She's 11 years old, but she is FAST when something falls off the counter. She's got the facial expressions down to such an art that even my husband, who normally chastises me for giving treats to dogs, "dropped" several pieces of turkey last night when he was slicing it up for dinner!
Thenk yew, thenk yew! I'll be here all week. Avoid the veal, and kick yer waitstaff..!
;-)
I have guaranteed compionship whilst cooking, even when I'm not 'dropping' things. Or even when I'm not training her. Of course, she *does* listen to commands better when she's in the kitchen, now, too. That's not such a bad thing, especially as my wife's been doing a bit of cany making, and we want Suka to NOT eat the chocolate! The fact that she listens well in the kitchen is a definte 'plus.'
Congrats on your new family member, and God Bless for rescuing a "higher-than-usual" needs dog. The love you'll get in return will more than compensate! Just be sure to keep your eyes on her weight. You should be able to feel her ribs, just a bit, when you rub your hands along her sides. Kidney issues go much better in a dog who's in the normal weight-range.
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