Well, y'all know we've been taking Suka for Saturday evening walks down Main street all summer. It's "Move In" week for the U of D, and all the new students (and their parents) are swarming Newark. Seemed a good night for a little socialization
Last night, we decided to take both girls for a stroll down Main street. We've never gotten a reaction less favorable than indifferent to Suka; this time reactions were all over the map, but not a single indifferent reaction. Everyone's head, at the least, turned to look at Dakota. Jenn was handling Dakota, with Suka and I walking mostly a few steps behind, so I could watch both Dakota, and Jenn's techique (she's still learning some handling on-lead tips and tricks). Jenn did fine. Dakota did fine. Positioned where I was, though, I could clearly hear the comments that Jenn was missing. Mostly, it was some variation on "Wow! Look at that big dog!" Unfortunately, some of those "Wow!" comments were fear-tinged. Dakota is clearly a well-behaved dog, but she's not demonstrably friendly until you approach her. She doesn't insist on making friends, but will happily make nice with anyone whom approaches her. Which is fine - perfect even - in my book. I don't need a dog lunging about trying to make friends with every Tom, Dick, and Harry she sees - It's rude, from my perspective, for a dog to insist on thrusting herself into the face of people whom have shown no interest.
The problem, as I see it, is that I suspect some people whom are interested in greeting Dakota were staying back because she's so large. She's no more a threat or risk than Suka - Maybe less, to some degree, in that Suka is far more agile and much faster - but some people reacted to Dakota's sheer size as a threat. In fact, Dakota's behavior on-lead is quite a bit better than Suka's, I'm embarassed to admit. Suka must smell every smell, and so is all over the place within the scope of her lead, smelling everything she can. I had to tell her "Leave it" perhaps a score of times. Dakota, meanwhile, was quite pleased to simply walk along; Not one verbal correction required. Jenn did need to pop the lead a couple times to remind her to not pull, but even then, her idea of pulling is rather mild.
So... When presented with a clearly well-behaved dog, it's distressing to hear 'fear.' Almost as distressing were the people whom did wish to greet Dakota, but were a'feared to approach. Some of those, I was able to entice to let their desire to overcome their apprehension, with uniformly excellent results. I don't want people to fear my dogs. I want them to approach them politely, yes, but I also want them to approach - I need my dogs to behave appropriately with strangers, and there's only one way for that to happen - they must meet strangers! I do wish people were more willing to ask. With Suka, they do. With Dakota, they mostly erred on the side of not asking, even when clearly many of them wanted to. Dogs need love from people, and people benefit from loving dogs. I'm a bit sad that some people weren't taking a chance to get and give a little love. It's only their own internal filters, telling them "Big Dog - Be afraid!," that was standing between them and a little joy. After all, no one has ever been savaged by a small dog before!
Hmmm.
I'm a bit sad that some people weren't taking a chance to get and give a little love.
Damn me, if I didn't just stumble on a deep thought.
Fear, and denying oneself a chance at findling a moment of joy for the fear of a bad reaction... Fear, based upon a person's unquestioned filters and reactions. Gee... I wonder if that's more broadly applicable than just when watching Dakota? I wonder how many times I myself have denied some moment of joy by listening too well to my inner fears and filters?
Dogs teach us many things... Most of the lessons are unplanned.
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8 comments:
"she's not demonstrably friendly until you approach her."
it's also that dark face. I had a lovely lovely well mannered GSD bitch that was a true ambassador for the breed. People were afraid of her due to 1. breed 2. size 3. her face had a dark mask so it was hard to read her facial expression. One day a friend when with me and brought her blond GSD. Blondie was ...ahem...not always friendly but people would gravitate toward her before Karin.
between the breed issues (and some are legit, I won't ever own another GSD), and the black face.....you might have to actually invite people to pet Dakota.
Ah. Good point - I'll bear that in mind. Maybe I could give her something whimsical as an ice breaker. A brightly colored bandana around her neck, perhaps?
A bandana would be a cool idea, sure would not hurt to try!
Very true. Our previous GSD and even our current one receive/d the same reactions, unfortunately, but everyone wants to pet and love on the small dogs. But, quite often they tend to have 'Napoleon Complexes' and will snap or growl at hands reaching towards them uninvited. My previous Pom/papillon was that way, and I'm finding that even my new Chiweenie dog can be quite unpredictable when strangers approach her, while our GSD is reserved, just as their breed tends to be with strangers, but would rather lick and be petted than growl or snap at anyone.
It's sad that the bigger dogs get such a bad rap.I'm glad your walk went well and both dogs were on their good behaviors.
~Lisa
ps.
You commented on my recent blog post: "I'm very impressed with the clarity of these shots through glass. Not only your excellent camera work, but also the cleanliness of the glass itself - The staff must work very hard at maintaining conditions!"
*Thanks, but maybe you missed the part of that post where I wrote:
"These ‘through-the-glass’ photos were really difficult. Using flash is a no-no because of the glare, and worst of all, the aquarium cleaners don’t use a streak-free formula to clean their windows. You would think fingerprints would be a bigger issue, but instead all the windows have tell-tale streaks and smears. Maybe I should leave a note in the aquarium’s suggestion box?"
You would not believe how I had to position myself to find just a single clear/un-smeared spot to take photographs...and then had to stay still for so long in that spot for a jellyfish to 'pose' for me, that my kidlets got bored and wandered away. lol!
What I'll do for a great photo! :)
You're right, Lisa - I did rather skip over most of the text. I was too busy looking at the images. In support of which, kindly allow my shamefaced admission that yo're even better than I thought! ;)
I am amazed every time I read your blog. We have sooo much to learn about dogs and training. Our dog is great and very well behaved, but clearly we don't even know a tenth of what you do. Hank has such a good dispostion and is a quick learner. I keep wondering if I should get him into some kind ot therapy work. How do you know?
And a little feedback on this post. Sometimes even if I want to pet a dog, I won't ask because I don't want to disturb the people.
But, I must admit I often don't want my children approaching larger dogs because I don't know the dogs and especially the owners.
Hmmm.
IME, most bites come from smaller dogs. Whether that's because people take more liberties with them, or because they're more agile and fast, or because some people don't feel obliged to train small dogs, or because people are more scary to a small dog; I dunno. Certainly, Suka is waaay faster than Dakota - And so agile she could almost bite herself on the back of her own head. :-p Thankfully, she's a happy, well-adjusted, adequately confident dog, so there are no problems.
Generally, I expect people to ask, and very few people are offended by a simple "May I pet your dog?" People walking their dogs generally are proud of them, and happy to show them off when they can. If a dog is unfriendly, or has a particular issue with some kind of person, you'll be told when you ask. Don't be offended when some owner says "no, I'd rather you didn't." You've not lost anything, and haven't truly intruded. And asking is SO much more polite than the people whom feel entitled to just rush up and grab at a strange dog's head!
Of course, some sensible observation is important. If a dog is not behaving well, is over-excited, or appears out of countrol, then by all means, pass on by. Same for their handler - If the handler looks harrassed, well, leave them to their day. If, on the other hand, they're strolling, have their dog in-hand, and are making eye contact with people, then asking will do no harm at all.
I take the opportunity when someone asks, especially children, to do a little impromptu education - I watch their approach carefully, and if there's an issue (leaning in, hand over the head, grabbing, etc.) I ask them to step back a second, and teach them the correct way, and why it's the correct way, then ask them to try again.
I've never, not once, gotten any grief from people over my instructions.
Of course, if the dog I'm handling shows signs of anxiety, I reassess. That's the time to move the dog and the people apart, and then simply chat with the people until either the conversation is done, or until the dog relaxes.
I was told that our dogs teach us, and it's true. I also feel that we get the dogs we need, when we need to learn something, and experience has born that out for me, so far. If Hank is a well-behaved dog, well, that's what you needed, and he's doing his job. ;-) Conversely, some people can't hear the lessons, or refuse to. You'll read about some people of those in my sister's blog; Vet On The Edge. Clearly, you're not one of those!
Therapy work... It can be very rewarding, but requires that you pass some tests. Mostly, the tests are of you, more than they are of your dog. Hank would need to pass the AKC Canine Good Citizen test, or equivalent - Every therapy organization requires that level of behavior and training:
http://www.akc.org/events/cgc/index.cfm
The CGC tests you and your dog as a team and individually, to demonstrate your ability to handle common stressors and situations encountered in public. Frankly, most well-behaved dogs can pass this with minimal work.
In addition, each therapy organization has testing requirements specific to therapy work. Each group has handbooks or other training material. The requirements aren't difficult, and most groups offer training help.
The main groups working in the US are The Delta Society and Therapy Dogs International.
http://www.deltasociety.org
http://www.tdi-dog.org/
It's not hard; the monthly time commitments are quite tollerable (four or so hours per month), and the benefit is huge - If you're a people person (I daresay you might be ;-) ), well, you get to do nice things for people. And poeple whom are having a bad day get nice things done for them.
Meanwhile - I don't know all that much, really. I talk a good game, and I've been around dogs most of my life, and I volunteer, and I hang out with dog people, but I know people whom are REAL experts; I merely play one at home. Still, if anything I post helps, then by all means, you're most welcome, and thank you!
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